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Surprising cacophony may often occur
To tell on actions nether, covert;
With popping and creaking and swishing and more,
It squeals a tale—when privacy preferred.
Expressive the telling with “oohs” and “aahs,”
Dramatic pauses, then flurry of sounds.
Some groans to protest, moans to cry,
And exclamations matched to frowns.
At thirty-feet intestines long,
The muscular gut has massive work.
With gassy hazards in the mix,
The laborers think they're owed a perk!
Embarrassing, though, and fearsome oft,
No cause for alarm is usually meant.
Most noisy cases are healthy speech
Unless delivered with other event,
Like nausea, vomiting, bloody stools,
Excessive gas, abdominal pain,
Diarrhea, fever, heartburn, cramps…
Borborygmi else are safe and sane.