​Ever aware of his remarkable appetite, Shortfellow offered a thoughtful version of the well-known lines that contrast the different pronunciations of "scone."

I asked the maid in dulcet tone
To order me a buttered scone;
The silly girl has been and gone
And ordered me a buttered scone.
—Anonymous
​
His own contribution from a perspective of delayed gratification was as follows:

I asked Valet in even tone
To serve me up a buttered scone;
But dozing off, he slept till dawn
And offered then to bake the scone. 

I set my jaw to gnaw a bone
While waiting prone for tardy scone.
One's eyes may drift to yon bonbon,
But nothing beats the scent of scone.

Aromas clear as voice on phone
Alert my tooth when ready scone.
I bark for oven mitts to don
And rescue me a lovely scone.

What care I now which sound is borne
When tongue shall taste and then adorn?
What'er the name, this dog is sworn 
To never leave a scone forlorn.
—Shortfellow (aka Lord Zakwoof of Glenwoof)

​Shortfellow, in a moment of reflection about his diminutive but distinctive cousin, found himself here pointedly drawing on Lord Byron's famous lines for inspiration. He sought to convey his companion's quintessential character without specifically referencing her full title, which was Princess Zoelandia, the Supreme Huntress of the Woof Clan.

She walks in beauty like the night
Of cloudless climes and starry skies.
And all that's best of dark and bright
Meet in her aspect and her eyes.
—Lord Byron

She walks in booties, fit to fight,
With fearsome fang and piercing eyes.
And all the beasts that flee in fright
Run from her aspect, not her size.
—Shortfellow (aka Lord Zakwoof of Glenwoof)

She stalks in beauty like a cat
With endless time to play its prey.
And all that's pest, be thin or fat,
Find in her paws their final say.
—Shortfellow (aka Lord Zakwoof of Glenwoof)

​View cover page to match the notice,
Case number, caption, jurisdiction.
The witness name throughout from cover
Must spell the same with nary fiction.

Attorneys all on page appearance,
Phone number, email, address written;
On index page exhibits scripted,
Page number, line, description given.

If no exhibits, marked or clerk-held,
A statement clear should be on index;
For read-and-sign with sheets errata,
Certificates in line with context.

Interpreter/witness-blurbs that swear-in
With certs of “Oath” should stand affirming;
A single cert may serve both parties,
“INTERPRETED” in caps proclaiming.

As modern beings, humans are so attached to the canine norm that the well-known lines of the Divine Image by William Blake suggest an interesting parallel. 

…To Mercy, Pity, Peace, and Love
All pray in their distress;
And to these virtues of delight 
Return their thankfulness…


To Mirth and Joy and Foolery great
Pledge dogs both fierce and mild;
And for these virtues of delight,
We keep them by our side.

For Mirth is in the canine eye,
And Joy, the canine heart;
And Foolery swells the canine chest,
Though never a la carte. 

Thus all must love the canine norm
In mutt or Heeler blue.
Where Mirth and Joy and Foolery dwell,
There Dog is dwelling too.

​

Transcript proofreaders can usually expect the text received from the stenographer and/or scopist to be organized as a cover page, an appearance page, and an index page, followed by a chronicling of the proceedings. In addition to detailing the various instances of Q&A and colloquy, the proceedings will include notes on all other developments and events, identifying them as parenthetical components.


Cover page, appearance page,
And index page are lead-ins,
Setting stage to let engage
The by-lines of proceedings.

Q&A and colloquy
Seek progress through their speaking,
Hindered in reality
By interruptions tweaking.

Steno loggers track it all,
The circumstances quoting,
Even parenthetical
Events with care denoting.

​To properly transcribe numbers in legal documents, proofreaders are guided by two simple rules and some related exceptions. Among the latter is the presentation of phone numbers, addresses, and years as figures only when they are located at the beginning of sentences.

​
When legal transcripts deal with numbers 
The basic rules are only two.
Exceptions, though, expand the counting,
And tell that two can barely do.

Think first of ten and down to zero,
Expecting there to spell them out.
Eleven then and up to heaven,
Sketch rising numbers, draw them out.

Exceptions force a switch to digits
For money, measures, dates, percent.
Aside from "One," the same with houses--
And figures that from nouns extend.

Not all exceptions favor digits,
Example being sentence starts;
When numbers get the ball a-rolling,
It’s mostly time for spelling arts.